THIS IS THE WORST NEWS I’VE EVER HEARD.
Look, I get it. Frozen made more money than God on the day He made money (the third day, I believe), but Maelstrom is one of the greatest theme park attractions ever designed.
Please check out this blog post I wrote years ago about how much I love this ride. I think it gives some idea about how bat shit insane Maelstrom is. More proof is this image of a magnet currently hanging on my fridge that I bought last time I rode Maelstrom:
Just like the ride, this magnet makes no sense. Seriously, look at it. Here is everything hilarious about it:
- All of the trolls are wearing Mickey ears. However, one of them is wearing Mickey pants. Which is fine, but none of the others are wearing costumes so why only do one?
- The text reads “…It’s a Troll world!” which you would think is a play off of “It’s a Small World.” But, if that were the case, why the hell would you put an ellipses there? And why wouldn’t you make it “It’s a troll world after all” which is the full quote? As is, it means fucking nothing.
- Most importantly, all the trolls’ noses look like male genitalia. Like, for real.
I love that magnet. I love Maelstrom. I now hate Frozen.
I am genuinely really upset right now.